Let’s dispense with the obvious first. This is a harem sexy-time book. If you don’t want to listen to that, the rest of the review is meaningless. This was the first one of these that I’ve tried and I’m quite sure it will be my last. It’s not my thing, so I don’t feel it would be fair to include my opinion on that part of the book(s).

My biggest issue is the writing quality. The author appeared to be intent on getting his story picked up as a mature video game. The plot is fairly basic, but the reader is thrown into the story without much set up. The author assumes the audience plays video (or pen and paper) games and understands the concept of skill points and various other role playing game-mechanics. It feels like a lazy way to explain why the main character develops powers incrementally. It also creates a divide between the reader and being immersed in the story.

The main story is fast paced – possibly because it is an afterthought. The main goal is crafting a scenario where the harem sexy-time can happen, so the characters bounce from one adventure to the next without much time spent on everyday interactions that living beings would have when they aren’t fighting, planning, or having sex. The characters are on an epic adventure, but it feels like each new challenge was invented only to top the last, instead of having a logical progression or sculpted plan.

The author actually did a fine job with character interactions in some scenes. I was impressed by some of the language at times and felt a few of the descriptions were clever. At the same time, interactions that are notable to the main character as being unusual or something to think about later were described with very few words – essentially saying that the incident was important to remember, but giving very little description to make it memorable to the reader.

Hawke (the author) introduces characters with little backstory and feeds it to the reader in pieces as the story progresses. The protagonist’s history is added whenever it is convenient or necessary to explain his motivation. It’s as if the character had no real planned background and “we can just fill that in as we go.”

Some of the characters were likable and believable. The voice cast does an excellent job of differentiating the characters vocally until book four. Justin Thomas James, Yvonne Syn, Jeff Hays, and Carly Crawford did a wonderful job with the material they were given. I would gladly read another story any of them were involved in.

Hawke doesn’t appear to be interested in delving into character’s recent past until after they’ve had sex with the main character (with exceptions, of course). When we get to book 4, the newly added characters are poured in in droves. They aren’t romantic interests for the main character (at least by this point), so giving them clear identities is lost after a physical description and a single mannerism for each one: the angry one, the crazy one, the quiet one…etc.

My summary: This reads like it was written by a horny 14-year old during creative writing class instead of paying attention to the lessons.