Who wrote this stuff anyway?

I like a good story, preferably an historical novel…with good dialog. That isn’t this book. The narrative is fine. However the dialog isn’t. In fact it stinks. It is amateurish, dull, and is nothing like what men say to and about other men. I keep asking myself if it wasn’t written by a girl.

Want an example? Career military men (and women) do not refer to the things that go BANG as bullets. They are called ammunition, or rounds if speaking about singles. And career Army officers do not swear like a bunch of drunks when engaging in their official duties, especially in the presence of enlisted personel.

How about another? Ballsy females can be entertaining unless the story turns into a drama queen fest. Aussie women can be just like the author says. But the dialog between a cranky old cop and a ballsy female business owner should be a it more circumspect and a lot less of a power trip in which the cranky male cop sulks off. That’s especially true when the story line says he is seriously concerned about the woman’s welfare.

Things work when the older authority figure is respectful if not fatherly. The powerful woman can even be dismissive if she thinks she is built proof. But even arrogant women don’t dismiss the man AND his concern. Dismiss one or the other but not both. Doing so makes the lead female character look unnecessarily stupid. It makes her look small. People want to like the characters. There is no reason to diminish a good guy when it isn’t required to make the story work.

Things may better. I hope so. But if chapter four isn’t any better than chapters one through three, I may turn this turkey in for a refund.