I honestly hope many of these reviews are paid astroturfing because otherwise my faith in humanity has been deeply shaken. I stuck it out till the end and it was a complete waste of time that I’m still mad about. Save yourself the time and skip this whole series.

The main character is the most unlikeable person. Between the MC narrator and the dialogue, the main character is Jerry from Rick and Morty specifically the Hungry for Apples simulation episode . He has as much spine and self determination and self reflection as a jellyfish. He is a useless, whiny, irresponsible man-child. Nothing is planned, things just happen to him and always magically work out through no skill, preparation, or even forethought of the MC.

Secondary characters are painfully shallow, a few have mysterious backgrounds that are never elaborated on and I’m guessing never will be. Dialogue is painfully explicit frequently stating and repeating the obvious. Character development is frequently done off camera and are complete 180s from where the character when they were last seen. The all powerful evil noble is comically incompetent doing nothing of his own volition or acting independently. He doesn’t even do much to prove his personal power. The mimic is mildly amusing but is a poorly written hybrid of Minic and Boxy from Everybody Loves Large Chests.

The plot is just just a stack of Deus ex Machinas in a trench coat. The only reason anything happens is because the plot demands and not through any natural progression. Everything is told and not shown. Multiple continuity errors. Outright factual errors. Potato salad is almost never vegan, because eggs, its vegetarian. Words have meanings don’t use them if you don’t know what they mean.

This clearly had no editor and revision was probably just running it through Grammarly. Please have someone else read your writing before you submit it.

I honestly wonder if this was largely AI generated as the style strongly reminds me of output I’ve gotten from chatbots, Forgetting story context, missing emotional/social connotations etc. If I’m guessing they fed it Everybody Loves Large Chests and asked from a PG version of the story with less murder and adult themes.