This would be my 2nd time reading and listening to it and I for some reason didn’t write a review like I should have when I listened to it the first time. I know when I first read/listened to it I thought it had been one of the best historical MM romances I had read. This time reading/listening to it, I’m just kind of confused and have a lot of questions. But I still enjoyed it, but I’m not sure if I had enjoyed it the same amount as the first time, especially since I knew what was going to happen and what happens in book 2 (but not in book 3).

*Spoilers*

I know this is based during a time where being open about the fact that Ben and Phillip are in a gay relationship was looked down upon and I’m assuming from what both Ben and Phillip said, could put them in jail. But I found it sad that they had to hide and sneak around, along with not being able to admit to anyone that they were in love with each other, despite the fact that a couple characters already assumed or guessed who Ben was in a relationship with – Hartley and Ben’s housekeeper who married his father definitely know about his feelings and relationship with Phillip, but I’m not sure about Welsh/Walsh or Miss Crawford.

I really would have liked a bit more confirmation about who exactly knows about their relationship and feelings for each other and on what happened after the ending of the story. Did Welsh/Walsh know about Phillip and his feelings towards McCarthy on the ship? Did he realize Phillip was in a relationship with Ben and was part of the reason he chose to stay instead of going back out to sea? After Miss Crawford and Welsh/Walsh are married – since it was highly suggested they were going to get married sometime soon – did they stay in the town Ben and Phillip live in or did they decide to move to another town or city? Did Miss Crawford really not know who Ben fell in love with?

I am curious if the kids realized Phillip and Ben are in a relationship. I know everyone thought Phillip was going to marry Welsh/Walsh’s sister, but after he had made it clear he wasn’t and Ben is still staying around, I’m wondering if they put two and two together and figured it out. But I doubt I will ever know. I just hope they are supportive and are okay with it.

I also wonder if at some point Phillip and Ben won’t have to be as careful about hiding their relationship, like not needing to wake up at the crack of dawn to hide the fact Ben hadn’t slept in his bed, or if they were in the company of trusted people – such as Hartley or Will – that they could be open about acting a bit more intimately, such as holding hands or kissing.

Also, what exactly had they decided to do about arrangements? Is Ben living with Phillip or did he decide he wanted to live in a house near by? Hopefully he decided to live with Phillip. How are they fixing up the house they purchased from Martin and turning it into a school? Was Ben successful with his new school? Are Phillip’s kids attending his school? What is Phillip’s role in helping out with the school?

How did McCarthy die? Did he fall overboard or did he die from sickness?

Also, I could not figure out how old Ben and his siblings were, along with the majority of the other characters, such as Welsh/Walsh and Miss Crawford. I know Phillip is about 35 and Martin is about 21, Nate is 13 or 14, Jamie and Peggy are about 8 or 9, but I have no idea how old anyone else is. I’m assuming Ben is probably in his mid to late 20’s, maybe around 25, with Hartley being slightly younger – at least a year or two younger. But I would have liked to have known their ages, unless I had somehow missed it.

Another thing I would have liked to have read was to have seen Phillip bottoming for Ben. Phillip had made it clear he wanted to, but instead they had switched to Ben bottoming their first time. But I don’t think there was a scene with Phillip bottoming or at least one with the same amount of detail as the first time they did it, unless I had missed it and forgotten about it. But if I hadn’t missed it, then I would have liked to have seen it as in a way that scene was being built up but never came to fruition.

Another thing is that I suspect that Miss Crawford suffered from Polio and that Phillip and Jamie have dyslexia. I did a little bit of research and I believe Dyslexia can be hereditary and Miss Crawford’s symptoms matched to what people suffer from with Polio. I am curious though. Since it was clear that people had limited or no knowledge at all about what Miss Crawford, Jamie, and Phillip had, I am curious to know if people during this time period knew anything about STDs or HIV, since there was no mention of it or with using any safety precaution. But this is a fictional book, so I am probably taking this too seriously. But I couldn’t help thinking about it.

I think that is pretty much all the questions I had. I know the first time I read this book I also felt sad that they couldn’t share the knowledge about their relationship to other people. I will admit that I am not very familiar or I have very limited amount of knowledge with this period of time and what it was actually like for people to be in a gay relationship during this period of time. I also don’t know if people really swore like that either, such as with the f word or a couple other words they had used in this book. But then again this is a a fictional book.

*Narration*

I thought Joel Leslie did an amazing job. I didn’t have any issue with how he narrated any of the characters.

Overall, I did enjoy this book, but my enjoyment was definitely lessened because of my knowledge from reading/listening to this book before and with all of the questions I had throughout the book. I would recommend this book/series to other people as it is a good book.