Charlie:
Finally, some redemption for the first beloved, then loathed Charlie from the Rydeville Elite series!
To be honest, I did not think that Siobhan could redeem Charlie, who was perhaps the most heartbreaking character from the Rydeville stories for me. Oh, sweet Charlie. He did horrible things, his humanity totally derailed, and he was the least reliable character- constantly ping-ponging from the right team to the wrong. I loved him early on- he was the sweet teddy bear, seemingly the “heart” of the squad, and then we find that was an act. From then on, his motivations were always in question for me. Last we left him, he’d destroyed much of his life, but we didn’t feel any sympathy for him because he made his bed, even if he comes through at the end for our squad.
So, when I found it he was getting his “happy ending,” I wasn’t sure I could get back behind him- nor was I sure I could trust any emotion was genuine, that he would be a reliable narrator. And, thus, that was my orientation as I started to read Charlie’s story with Demi. Siobhan smartly begins this tale in the key moment when I gave up on Charlie- one of the many mysteries, namely, his and Abby’s botched wedding night. We find out just where he was- and with whom- and why, and we get a glimpse inside what losing Charlie’s father really did to him. And, with that shattering opening, my heart started beating for Charlie again.
He didn’t win me over completely, to be honest, or quickly- he spends much of this story in self-destruction mode- punishing himself for his sins and therefore punishing everyone else around him- and he loves nothing more than to punish and bully Demi, a woman he blames for what he sees as one of his gravest missteps. Oh, and she’s also his PA. We get the love-hate push-pull tension that Siobhan is so good at creating, we get to walk alongside two characters who are trapped in heartbreaking realities (Demi’s life has been derailed as she tries to care for her ailing father) and struggling to cope, and we see them slowly, and unwillingly, weave themselves together when their vulnerabilities they bottle up so closely accidentally seem to spill out with one another.
The romantic pace here is pretty quick- the feelings don’t have as much time to simmer and marinate as they would in a longer novel or trilogy, and we have a lot of ground to cover since we’ve not met Demi before. She suffers a bit for it- we don’t fully know her in the way we know Abby or Harlow or others, but I like her- she’s intelligent and sharp, she’s pretty patient, she’s stoic and rational- she’s grounding for Charlie, like a softer, more steady conception of Abby. And we get the gambit with Charlie- so much so that his emotional whiplash made it hard for me to believe his feelings were fully realized at the end (nor his slow re-entry into the lives of our favorites, like Kai and Abby)- but the bonus content we get in this version (vs. the anthology) really made a huge difference- both in my buy-in with Demi as well as my belief in Charlie.
If you read this story as part of the Bully Me: Class of 2020 anthology, GET THE EXTENDED VERSION. Had I rated the story based on just what was in the anthology, I would have probably given it 3.5 or 4 stars. I spiritually love anthologies because you get so much content, but the word limits really limit authors from telling anything that feels complete, which is why so many stories from that anthology ended up being prequels to full length novels. If you are curious, this is still a SHORT novel- but not a novella at 60K words. The extended version delivers 3 extra meaty chapters (two of which are epilogues) that answer some of the burning questions that made me feel Charlie was too hastily concluded in the anthology- particularly three things that felt crucial:
a) more of what Demi and Charlie looked like when they were actually committed and functional (much of Bully Me is them just working their way to being actually together): the extra content here is SO fulfilling and makes me really believe Charlie’s redemptive arc a lot more because I get to see him being the Charlie I wanted to believe he really was
b) more time with Demi: we don’t get three books to love her like we do with Abby, we only have a short novel. And, while I LIKED her in the anthology, I didn’t love her yet- I needed more time with her. Sure, a few extra chapters still mean she’s not my Abby, but we get to see some important moments for Demi that makes us feel more intimately connected to her
c) we find out what happened in that conclusion with Demi’s father
Overall, I’d give this 4.5 stars- Charlie does feel like he’s on the pathway to the redemptive arc, I care about him again, and we have some new ELITE drama brewing that is going to set us up nicely for Jackson and the future of this crew. After reading this, I’m happy Charlie is back at the table- and I think we’ll get more time with Demi, not only because of her relationship with Charlie but also because of her family history.
Jackson:
HOLY SMOKES. I’m left speechless- tears still misting in my eyes from the surprisingly bittersweet epilogue, heart pounding, butterflies in my tummy. I knew I’d enjoy his book- I love everything Siobhan does, but I never expected to have been so ravished by it, to fall so deeply in love with my now-favorite Siobhan book boyfriend Jackson (sorry Kai and Saint!), nor to feel so profoundly moved by the story of our heroine Vanessa and the soulful, tender, cathartic romance with Jackson.
We know and love Jackson from the stories we’ve already read, but in HIS book we get Jackson 2.0. The same fun loving, snarky, charming lady killer that we all grew to adore, also the same man that we realized was masking some deep emotional baggage that he’s camouflaging with his swagger and penchant for chemically medicating his pain and rage. Here, he’s evolved- we get to see more of his substance and depth. I knew there was more to Jackson, but I had no clue just how nuanced and dynamic Jackson was beneath his sassy veneer. Holy hell- this man moves me. He’s swoon worthy and delicious in the best ways – dirty talker, sexy AF, a veritable Adonis, and I’m pretty sure he could charm on the pants off a snake. But, what really made me swoon was his heart- the little cracks of true depth we see as this story slowly chips away at his facade until this beautiful, tender yet strong man appears. His loyalty, his conviction, his protectiveness combined with a sweetness and gentleness, a delicate and raw vulnerability all worked in perfect concert to create this perfect and soulful symphony of a man. So much depth- he’s more than just a pretty boy. And when he says “ I have something to say….”- lord, hold on to your heart and your panties.
And Nessa. I tear up just thinking about how beautiful of a spirit she is- what a revelation she was for me. I was not prepared to love, admire, and relate to this complex heroine nor for her to be my favorite SB woman. Like so many of us, she just wants to matter to someone, to be worthy of selfless love. To find some real connection in a sea of half truths. She wants to be seen- her pain and survival to be valued. This Nessa is nothing like the party girl Vanessa we had heard about and thought we knew- and even what we DO know about her has been completely misunderstood. We see that she’s sweet and caring, devoted and spirited. She’s also hurt and lost, insecure and tentative. But, at her core, she’s a fighter- not just for herself, but for those she loves, for what is right. I don’t just love her- I FLOVE HER. This says a lot, but I think she’s been through the ringer more than any other SD heroine-she’s broken by it, but not yet shattered. She’s resilient and even after all the harm she’s experienced from this f’ed up Elite world around her, she somehow still unflinchingly opens her heart to someone she knows can, and will, break it- she still has hope at her core. She left me feeling raw and exposed- moved and inspired by her bravery.
And them and a couple- O..MY.GOD. The connection between Jackson and Nessa is emotional, the chemistry explosive. Both characters are coping in harmful ways to try to survive and numb their personal adversity, both have trapped themselves in the protective armour of the allusions they’ve created about themselves so they can protect the truths- that they are hurting, that they are lost, that they are angry and sad. And, both find each other when they are both fighting to shift their lives- each figuring out who they are as adults and people outside of the painful histories that they’ve allowed to define them. And that leads to some earth shattering romance- yes, all the good steam, but even more so it was like watching two perfectly matched souls collide and then slowly weave themselves together thread by delicate thread. Their relationship feels natural and authentic as they become partners, as their love for each other reshapes what they thought was their purpose and helps them heal the pain that has consumed them both. Siobhan’s writing approach here was also nothing short of inspired- the first ½ of the book is intimate and slower paced, mostly one-on-one, with our leads mostly isolated from the pack- which really helps us swim around in this powerful connection before we get too deep into the intrigue and makes the drama to come that much more impactful.
And oh my- I have missed the Rydeville Elite world. Side by side with this touching, vibrant, and dynamic love story we have the seedy drama from the nefarious Elite. We get the page turning action and twists, the “just in time to save” the day moments that keep my heart pounding, and we get this kooky and endearing motley crue of Rydeville couples (and future couples) that have become this intense and functional family who support and protect other. I LOVE this crew- and I’m so glad we get time with each of them. Also- Sawyer REALLY shows up in this story in a fantastic way- and now I can’t wait for what is next from him.
Has this just become my favorite Siobhan story of all time?! This woman consistently rocks me- brings new and exciting characters and heart pounding stories into my life, but Jackson is truly spectacular- a story that I’m still left thinking, still left FEELING in my heart and soul days later. My words will never do it justice, so just pick it up and find out for yourself- you’ll find that the story of Jackson and Vanessa is surprising and shattering, beautiful and sweet- Siobhan, you continue to amaze me, but you’ve shattered and rebuilt my heart with this epic tale of two individuals recovering from their pain while also discovering themselves in their love for each other. I LOVE THIS STORY SO MUCH. I can’t wait to see what is in store next!
Sawyer:
I am always exhilarated to be back in the explosive and gritty Elite world- with all the volatile emotions, angsty and complicated relationship dynamics, and the elite world corruption and plotting. In the highly anticipated Sawyer, Siobhan whisks back into the middle of all the drama- and it is a wild ride.
Out of all the Rydeville crew, I was most anxious about Sawyer’s story. He’s a character I’ve always loved, but compared to firey Kai and feisty Jackson, he’s been the cold and distant one. They were all mysteries in their own ways, but Sawyer has always felt particularly closed off, tangled in his own head, distant and non-emotive. Could Siobhan stay true to this fabric of this character while opening him up to us? Can we find warmth and emotional connection in a character who has so clearly fought those very things? And, even more so, I was nervous FOR Xavier- whereas Sawyer is cold and stoic, Xavier is all warmth, exuberant energy, chaotic emotions. I’ve loved him so fiercely since we met him- and like Abby, I feel irrationally protective over him. He’s been the heart and light of this story in many ways, I needed him protected- even if this was Sawyer’s story. From what we’ve read between the pages about him and Sawyer, their relationships has been complicated, angsty, and undefined- and so I knew no matter what story Siobhan gave us (Sawyer with Xavier, Sawyer not with him, them with someone, etc) that the emotional growth would be up to Sawyer, and that those growing pains would be hard on our sweet, eccentric Xavier- risking me feeling even more unsure about Sawyer.
But that is where this story excels- in Sawyer himself. We have several other characters that this story involves and impacts (including some of our past favorites), but this book is called Sawyer for a reason. I won’t tell you much about the plot- but there are plenty of reviews that tell you just who gets the HEA, but here’s what you need to know, we have multiple people’s needs at stake, they will all disappoint you because everyone is very imperfect, and that the focus is truly Sawyer. This is HIS story- about his growth. And, while we have some Elite mystery that the Rydeville Scooby Gang is working to solve and we also end up with some pretty spectacular dark intrigue and drama, this is about an emotional liberation for our most restrained leading man. About him unleashing his full self and his full heart.
Narratively, there are some unexpected and interesting choices to this story- the voices we hear and the Elite drama that underscores the romance. I know and trust that Siobhan is an incredible mastermind- always finding the right balance between weaving the larger cross-story narrative and building the standalone romance. So, I know there was intentionality here, even if I’m not yet clear on the why of some of those choices. This story definitely felt different to me in terms of how the story unfolded than its predecessors (the blurb itself indicates it will be) , which definitely kept me on my toes. From the blurb I was worried I wouldn’t know just who to invest in emotionally, but Siobhan cleverly finds a way to make that clear to us- even if we don’t know where it’s going. The sexy burn was also much slower than the prior Rydeville crew, which was an interesting change of pace but made a lot of narrative sense given the relationship dynamics (trying not to spoil so being vague) and Sawyer’s character arc. This is a character that has NEVER had an issue connecting physically- it’s emotionally that is his problem, and so isolating his story to focus on his emotional conflict and repression is a brilliant way to force him to confront it, and to allow his character growth to shine.
We have an incredibly explosive ending- after a lot of angst and a more meta-focused story we get a lot of Elite drama and twists- and the usual Elite grit and violence. We also have a huge emotional catharsis, one that is tremendously rewarding after all the indecision and angst- and one that is touchingly sweet amid all the darkness. In the end, the right people find their way to each other- even if I wanted to stew a bit more in their happiness, and to live more in the head of my favorite person. But, again, this was about Sawyer shining- and Sawyer shines indeed. I’m SO READY FOR DREW.