I’m going to start by saying, i loved this book. I want to be clear on that fact. Both the first book, and now this one, have been thoroughly enjoyable, and I am eagerly looking forward to the third. In fact I’m a member of the authors pateron feed just so I can read the chapters as they come out.
Like with the first book, the Narator has knocked this out of the park, really adding to the story with their telling of the story. And at 11 hours long, it’s the perfect length for an audio book. Long enough that it feels like it doesn’t end just after it starts like some titles in this genre, but not so long that it feels like it goes on forever. The character development and world building continues to excite.
All of which leads me to the one minor problem I have. I’d ignored it in the first installment because I didn’t want to be accused of having a problem with someone being gay, when that couldn’t be further from the truth. It just didn’t seem worth mentioning what I felt was a legitiatement writing issue, when it was minor at best. But when the same type of issue came up in the second installment, I felt it was worth mentioning.
Let me explain what I’m talking about.
Neither the first book nor this second installment, really pay much if any attention to romance, which is obvious because it’s not a romance story. it’s a comedy / Adventure story. What very minor attention is given to shipping, is done for the sole purpose of minor character building. it has basically no impact on the story. In fact, i’d go so far as to say that you could pretty much eliminate all the shipping elements in the story and have basically no impact.
That said, what elements have been included, minimal as they might be, have been awkward to read because of the inconstancy which distracts from the otherwise brilliant immersion effect the author and Narrator have managed to achieve.
Let me explain what I mean. In the first book, whenever the author gave any attention to romantic chemistry (what few words there were), he spent foreshadowing at an interest between the two main characters. We’re talking minor things like Eve commenting in her mind about how good Wes looks in the rain, and such. As I said, this was VERY Minor. i think perhaps a handful of sentences in total to this effect. The third main character, Preston, was always written to be your blatantly stereotypical gay man, which just added to the overall atmosphere and lightheartedness that the story was instilling in the banter and such between the characters. And then suddenly in the final third of the book, all of a sudden, WHAM, out of no where, Wes is apparently gay, Is in a romantic relationship with Preston, has no interest in Eve or any other woman for that matter, and Eve isn’t even surprised really.
None of this is an issue. As I said, the story isn’t a romance and very little attention is given to it. It wouldn’t even be worth mentioning at all if it wasn’t for the abrupt about face. Now at the time, I remember thinking, the author likely just changed his mind near the end of the first draft, decided he wanted Wes and preston to be a thing, and just forgot to remove the foreshadowing from earlier On. No big deal.
Only you see exactly the same thing happening now in this second Installment. About 70-80% through, all of a sudden even goes from being an obviously hot blooded woman who is totally into guys, and then all of a sudden, she’s into women, but maybe guys too. and again, who cares, it’s no big deal, and it has no bearing on the story. My issue isn’t with the character’s orientation, it’s with the way it’s written. By the time the scene I’m referring to arrives, we’re something like 70+ chapters into the story between the two books, some 20 hours of narration, and in that entire time, there hasn’t been so much as a hint that this character leins that way. In fact there’s been exactly the opposite, with what hints there are to the characters sexual orientation showing that she’s straight. Why bring it up at all, or rather, if you feel that it’s worth including in the story period, which the author obviously does, why not include in before now.
The best example in my opinion of an excellent book is it’s ability to immerse the reader in the story. the more fully the reader can immerse themes;ves, the better job the author has done in writing. That’s my feeling anyways. In this case, the author did a great job. Except for this one small point.
I don’t think thing I did a great job explaining but there it is. My advice is this. Be consistent. If you feel the need to include any fact about your characters, be consistent, because if your not, it destracts from that immersion. It’s no different then saying your character has Blond hair for 70% of your story only to say they have Black Hair. It’s a minor detail, any won’t catch it, but for those who do, it’s going to cause them to stop to think, hey didn’t he say xxx… a few hours ago. And that act has just pulled them from the immersion in your story.